Something I hear often when I mention self-care is “I don’t know how to care for myself” with an underlying, unsaid “I don’t deserve it” or the stickiest limiting thought, “I’m not good enough”.

How often do you think, “I’m not good enough”? As you start the process of creating new beliefs for yourself (how about, “It’s possible I’m good enough” for a start??) engaging in mindful self-compassion practices will help you along the way.

One of my favourite meditation practices is the Loving Kindness meditation. There are many versions of this meditation, and I’ve got one here for you to try.

Our beliefs shape our mindset and our mindset creates our life. In other words, what we believe to be true causes feelings and emotions that lead us to behaving in a particular way.

A definition of belief is “an acceptance that a statement is true or that something exists”. Many of our core beliefs and values have been there from a very young age, and many we don’t need to question because they serve us well.

However, when they’re beliefs that stop us from achieving our dreams and moving forward in our lives, it’s important to question their validity. They’re often what we call limiting beliefs.

It’s one thing to know that your mindset creates your life, but when you’re feeling really uncomfortable or in actual pain, it’s often really hard to think thoughts that are supportive to your well-being.

Our thoughts and feelings have a back and forth relationship; our thoughts create our feelings and our feelings influence and create more thoughts. That means that if you wake up in the morning and feel pain or discomfort, you’re likely to have a thought that isn’t so positive. Those negative thoughts will create even more uncomfortable feelings and sensations in your body and you may end up in a thought/feeling feedback loop.

We all know that a negative mindset won’t help you create an ideal life. So how can we manage uncomfortable sensations and pain?

One of the benefits of becoming still and being present is connecting with your inner self, that true essence part of yourself who knows what it is you really want.

There are several ways to reach that pure, essential part of yourself including meditation practices, movement practices and mindful writing practices.

A type of meditation practice I love is guided visualization. It’s particularly powerful when you spend time journaling afterward.

Here’s a guided visualization that takes you on an inner journey to your true self. The part of you that is just waiting to shine through.

One of the most difficult challenges many of us have is keeping commitments and showing up for ourselves. We don’t have much difficulty showing up for others in our lives, but we are constantly telling ourselves that there’s no time for us.

In my opinion, that’s a really big mistake. Why? Because making time for yourself, and committing to that time, will ultimately help you create more time in your life for others.

Whenever we’re in the process of making changes in our lives, whether it’s a big decision (i.e., moving, changing careers, retiring, buying a car, etc.) or even if it’s something smaller like cleaning a messy closet, our brains love to tell us that we’re confused, we don’t know how, or that we’re stuck.

We end up drowning in overwhelm and stress because we think we need to get it done quickly and the problem seems way too big; there are just too many pieces to contemplate.

When you’re asked if you’re happy, what is your response?

What does it mean to be happy?

Here’s a definition of happiness I found in an online dictionary:

“Happiness is an emotional state characterized by feelings of joy, satisfaction, contentment and fulfillment. While happiness has many different definitions, it is often described as involving positive emotions and life satisfaction.”

Based on that definition, I believe that happiness is possible for all of us.

I saw an interesting question in a Facebook group from a woman who asked everyone to chime in on what they thought was most important in self care. She gave 4 choices and they were: A) Exercise, B) Healthy Eating, C) Mindset, D) Daily Routine.

There were over 100 responses and about one-third were A) Exercise, one-third were B) Healthy Eating and the rest were divided between C) Mindset and D) Daily Routine.

I wanted to choose all of the responses because I believe all of them are important, but if I were to choose one, it would have to be D) Daily Routine because it incorporates all of the above.

Fear is a complicated emotion and can be mild (i.e., all the unknown factors before starting a new job) all the way up to very intense (i.e., when a bear is chasing you). In the latter case, fear is really useful to produce the adrenaline that will get you to safety. It’s the flight, fight or freeze response and it’s not as welcome when we’re faced with new challenges in our life.

Take a moment (and maybe get out a journal and a pen) and ponder the following question:

What am I afraid of? Write down everything you can think of, even if it feels ridiculous.

I’ve been working hard this summer on various projects and courses, and this week my husband and I had the opportunity to take a break and relax for a couple of days at our friends’ home on the lake. It was a lovely mini-break in a beautiful spot with dear friends and the weather was perfect.

While we were there, I was determined not to do any work (I didn’t take my computer) and I was determined to spend minimal time scrolling on my phone. Most of the time we were busy visiting and I didn’t miss the busyness of “real” life at all. There was one time, though, when I found myself sitting alone on the deck with nothing to do, no one to talk to, and no phone with me. It was really peaceful - and it felt really strange.