How to Build Self-Worth (and why it’s so important)
Try these strategies, mindful journal prompts, and a self-compassion meditation
“You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.”
Sharon Salzberg
When there are major changes, health challenges (personal or family members), or other hurdles (such financial difficulties) in our lives, we often feel helpless and our self-worth may deteriorate.
In particular, women in midlife and beyond often report feeling confused, lonely, isolated, and invisible, resulting in feelings of lower self-worth.
When this happens, it’s important to offer yourself compassion and start the process of building it up again.
What is self-worth? It’s the belief that no matter what happens, and whatever stage of life you’re in, you are worthy of love and compassion from yourself and others. Self-worth differs from self-esteem in that it is more about who you are inside, not what where you work or what you do, where you live, how old you are, or how much money you have.
Why is self-worth important? When you have a healthy amount of self-worth, it helps you to be more resilient when negative external circumstances occur. In other words, when you believe in who you are and know your intrinsic value, you’ll have the ability to recover faster from setbacks and difficulties. This includes knowing you’re valuable even if you make mistakes or someone says something negative about you.
Positive self-worth has an impact on so many areas of your life. It impacts your ability to regulate stress, how you perceive and react to failures, and helps you be more open to learning from your mistakes. You will be more likely to engage in your own self-care and believe you deserve love and respect from others.
When you have a healthy amount of self-worth, you won’t say negative or diminishing things about yourself. In other words, you’ll stop believing you’re not “good enough”.
Strategies to increase your self-worth
Recognize and internalize the belief that everyone makes mistakes. Learn to support yourself and have your own back when you make mistakes.
Understand that your self-worth isn’t equal to your material worth. For example, your worth as a human being has nothing to do with where you live, the car you drive, or how much money you have in the bank.
Know that all people aren’t going to like you and some will judge you, because that’s what humans do. What other people think, say and do has more to do with them than with you. Self-validation enables self-worth.
Learn to have boundaries and say “no” when requests don’t align with what you believe and/or what you really want to do.
How you talk to yourself matters. Notice your thoughts and question thoughts that aren’t supportive. When you have a negative thought about yourself ask, “Is it true”?
Practice self-compassion. Here’s a self-compassion meditation for you to try:
Mindful Journaling for Self-Worth
One of the most helpful and effective ways to gain more understanding about yourself and your beliefs to increase your self-worth is to spend time connecting your mind and body through journaling.
Here are some mindful journal prompts to help you gain clarity.
What do you love about yourself? Why? Try to fill a whole page.
What are your three best qualities?
What would your friends and family say are your strengths?
What area(s) of your life do you think you could improve? Why?
What qualities do you value in other people? Where do you see those qualities in yourself?
These journal prompts will get you started. Spending time thinking about these questions will help you build confidence in yourself and start quieting your negative thoughts.
Always remember that you are in control of your life, how you speak to yourself, who you spend time with, and what you do each day.
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I’d love to hear from you so please send any comments or questions to me at sharon@sharonashtonmindfulyoga.com. Feel free to share this email with anyone else who may be interested.
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What is stopping you from living your best life? Get out your journal and a pen and take the new quiz on my website to find out:
Are you interested in learning more about life change & mindset coaching from a mind/body perspective? Please email me at sharon@sharonashtonmindfulyoga.com for more information or to schedule a free introductory consultation to see if coaching is right for you. You can also visit my website coaching page.
"I felt at complete ease with Sharon from our first conversation. She has a wonderful, gentle but firm way that made me focus on my thoughts / feelings so I could remove / change to move forward with a completely different feeling to what felt like obstacles. It was great having regular coaching that gently kept me accountable to actioning and moving towards my goals. Sharon has vast experience in so many areas, I felt that makes her an amazing coach.”
— Michelle Carney, East Galway, Ireland
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