The “I’ll Do It Someday” Trap
Use the wisdom of your body/mind to live your best life now.
This is it….. This is the time….. Right now….. The present moment.
We have to stop procrastinating and saying “someday when………….., I’ll……………………”.
I saw this poem in a Facebook post and it moved me so much that I wanted to share it with you. It was written by Donna Ashworth and can be found in her book History will remember when the world stopped. She wrote it in response to the strange life circumstances we find ourselves in due to the pandemic:
“What if you’re never ready?
What if, this is as close to being ready that you’ll ever actually be?
What if, the biggest regret you have when you look back on your life, is that you wasted time waiting, waiting to be better, when you were already so very much enough?
What if, the last thought you have when your life comes to an end, is that you didn’t do enough living whilst you were alive?
My friend, this is it.
This is your life, right here, right now.
And let me tell you something...somebody somewhere went to sleep last night assuming tomorrow would be a new day.
And it wasn’t.
Today is the day.
Every day is the day.
Life waits for no one.
Seize the moment, seize the day.
Dance like nobody’s watching.
Watch the sunset.
Eat the delicious cake.
Put your bare feet on the cool grass.
Be alive.
Be ALIVE.
Put your hand on your chest and feel that heartbeat pulsing through your body.
That’s all you need to be ready.
That is truly all the purpose you really need.
You, my friend, are alive.
So live.”
It reminded me of the “I’ll do it someday” trap we get ourselves into. Do you ever find yourself saying something like:
Someday, when I have the money, I’ll……………………..
Someday, when I have the time, I’ll ………………………..
Or what about what I call the “sneaky” someday thoughts:
I’ll start exercising when…………….
I’ll look for a new job when……………..
Tomorrow I’ll ………………
What holds you back from doing any of the things you really want to do TODAY? I know for me, most of the time it’s fear - fear of failure, rejection, lack of security, or the unknown. Here’s another big block to success - imposter syndrome (more on that another time…. :). Almost everyone I know experiences that one. More and more people who I’ve connected with this year feel exactly the same way.
So what do we do about it?
We need to take a deep breath, and do what scares us anyway. We need to take very small turtle steps towards our goals. We need to question our limiting beliefs and realize that our feelings are not unique or unusual and our thoughts may not be true.
I like to remind myself that there is no “failure”, there are only learning opportunities.
What can you do to fight fear?
One of the most useful tools I’ve learned in my coach training so far is one called the body compass. It’s one of the first tools we learned as it is key in helping you determine whether something is right for you or not. Martha Beck, my mentor and founder of Wayfinder Life Coach Training, believes that our bodies know the right answer for us and can set us on our paths towards our purpose. Martha’s book, Finding Your Own North Star, details practices to access both your body and emotional compasses and I highly recommend it. Here’s a very brief adaptation of the practice you can try to feel into your body. What is it trying to tell you?
Brief Body Compass Practice
Sit up tall with a straight spine or lie down in a comfortable position, Start with a general body scan, slowly moving from your toes to the top of your head. Sit quietly and really notice how your body is feeling.
Notice how you feel when you are in a state of rest, rating it on a scale of -10 (very unpleasant) to 10 (very pleasant) with 0 being neutral, and use that as a baseline whenever you are facing a new challenge.
Consider what you want to do and notice how your body feels as you’re thinking about it. There will likely be some apprehension as you consider this new venture, but if there’s also a feeling of excitement, or anticipation, or even joy, then you may want to explore it further. Rate this feeling from -10 to 10 and compare it with your baseline score.
If you’re interested in learning more about these practices, or you’re interested in learning more about life coaching from a mind/body perspective, please email me at sharon@sharonashtonmindfulyoga.com. I’d be happy to talk to you about it.
References:
Finding Your Own North Star: claiming the life you were meant to live by Martha Beck
History will remember when the world stopped by Donna Ashworth
I’d love to hear from you so please send any comments or questions to me at sharon@sharonashtonmindfulyoga.com. Feel free to share this email with anyone else who may be interested.
You are also invited to join my free Facebook group The Journey Within Mindful Yoga and Life Change Community here where we can connect to share resources and short mindful yoga and meditation practices:
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